Sorry guys.

"If only EssExTee could be so grossly incandescent" (essextee) 11/26/2016 at 20:29 • Filed to: None

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It’s been confirmed. A gay man has just told me that the Miata is totally, unequivocally a gay car.

Sam > If only EssExTee could be so grossly incandescent 11/26/2016 at 20:32

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Damn...

Birddog > If only EssExTee could be so grossly incandescent 11/26/2016 at 20:33

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Well shucks..

Jake - Has Bad Luck So You Don't Have To > If only EssExTee could be so grossly incandescent 11/26/2016 at 20:33

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When I first got my na I went to a gay bar with a gay friend in it just to fully experience the Miata lifestyle.

For Sweden > If only EssExTee could be so grossly incandescent 11/26/2016 at 20:37

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I don’t see the problem

DipodomysDeserti > If only EssExTee could be so grossly incandescent 11/26/2016 at 20:37

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Why are you apologizing?

ttyymmnn > If only EssExTee could be so grossly incandescent 11/26/2016 at 20:41

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And?

Dr. Zoidberg - RIP Oppo > If only EssExTee could be so grossly incandescent 11/26/2016 at 20:42

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Next time I see my mother, I’ll be sure to pass that along

Ike > If only EssExTee could be so grossly incandescent 11/26/2016 at 20:43

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Are you sure he’s gay? go back and make sure

Xyl0c41n3 > If only EssExTee could be so grossly incandescent 11/26/2016 at 20:46

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And Mustangs were marketed as a “secretary’s car.” Everything you can afford, “on a secretary’s salary.” And if that wasn’t sexist enough, the closing image implies that a woman who buys a “secretary car” would assuredly find her happily ever after by getting married.

Maybe instead of caring about whatever bullshit stereotype is associated with a particular car, just drive what you like.

jkm7680 > Xyl0c41n3 11/26/2016 at 20:49

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I have literally never heard that until right now.

vondon302 > If only EssExTee could be so grossly incandescent 11/26/2016 at 20:51

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Well it is supposed to be the answer to everything.

WilliamsSW > If only EssExTee could be so grossly incandescent 11/26/2016 at 20:51

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Sounds like he’s trying to claim it for his own. Don’t let him. #miatasforeveryone

If only EssExTee could be so grossly incandescent > Xyl0c41n3 11/26/2016 at 20:52

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I give this lecture an 8/10 for unprovokededness

comes over to help work on your car and only drinks beer > Dr. Zoidberg - RIP Oppo 11/26/2016 at 20:57

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Pretty sure I’ll see your mom before you do, I’ll let her know.

(I mean, we’ve got “X is gay”, figured if we’re jumping back to middle school, we should also have some “your mom” jokes)

yamahog > jkm7680 11/26/2016 at 20:58

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Congrats on learning something today.

jkm7680 > yamahog 11/26/2016 at 21:01

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It’s also interesting how they specifically marketed them to secretaries.

Odd how times have changed.

fhrblig > If only EssExTee could be so grossly incandescent 11/26/2016 at 21:03

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If we’re defining ‘gay car’ as a car that gay men frequently own and drive, I’m gonna disagree. Virtually every Miata I’ve observed in recent years has been driven by straight guys (or at least what my gaydar is telling me are straight guys). I see way more gays in BMWs.

yamahog > If only EssExTee could be so grossly incandescent 11/26/2016 at 21:03

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Unprovoked? Could’ve sworn I’ve heard you say something about not letting one person speak for a whole group before.

pip bip - choose Corrour > If only EssExTee could be so grossly incandescent 11/26/2016 at 21:04

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who cares! even if you were gay, would it matter? NOPE!!

ranwhenparked > If only EssExTee could be so grossly incandescent 11/26/2016 at 21:08

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Gays always try to claim everything nice. They already have South Beach and mojitos, how much more do they need?

For Sweden > Xyl0c41n3 11/26/2016 at 21:13

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These was once a time when Mustangs were driven by attractive, single, career-focused women, instead of by dude-bros.

It was a better time.

yamahog > For Sweden 11/26/2016 at 21:16

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attractive, single, career-focused women

I still know a few Mustang drivers who fit this description.

For Sweden > yamahog 11/26/2016 at 21:17

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I thought all the great women drove Camaros

Mercedes Streeter > Ike 11/26/2016 at 21:19

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And uh...take pics?

TheHondaBro > yamahog 11/26/2016 at 21:20

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I don’t drive a Mustang nor am I a woman, but thanks for thinking I’m attractive.

fhrblig > Mercedes Streeter 11/26/2016 at 21:21

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Well, that depends.

Xyl0c41n3 > jkm7680 11/26/2016 at 21:21

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Yep. It was part of their marketing campaign in the 60s. There’s still remnants of that around today. I’ve heard numerous men say they don’t like Mustangs (over Camaros or Chargers/Challengers) because they’re women’s cars. The most recent time was when I saw a really sweet looking 2014 in a parking lot. I started taking pics and this guy walked by staring at me. I thought he was the owner, and I didn’t want to piss him off, so I asked if it was his car, meaning to strike up a conversation and compliment him on it. His response? “Nah. Those are chick cars.”

yamahog > For Sweden 11/26/2016 at 21:23

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Flattery will get you... a ride to our safe off-the-grid compound when the end of days is nigh. Provided you can help build a new ice fishing shanty. Dog ate the old one.

Xyl0c41n3 > For Sweden 11/26/2016 at 21:23

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Imagine a world where great women drive whatever the fuck car they want. Oh shit! That world exists! :O

Mercedes Streeter > If only EssExTee could be so grossly incandescent 11/26/2016 at 21:23

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I have a trans friend who says the gay-est cars are Subaru wagons. I mean, she did name her car “The Lesbaru”.

Car stereotypes are only fun if you’re a member of said community. :P

jkm7680 > Xyl0c41n3 11/26/2016 at 21:23

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Wow, I’m surprised something like that would carry on so far. More than likely just limited to that generation.

Surprisingly, I’ve never had my Jetta called a “chick car.”

XJDano > If only EssExTee could be so grossly incandescent 11/26/2016 at 21:24

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I’d still try one, just to see if I like it.

yamahog > TheHondaBro 11/26/2016 at 21:25

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but do you have a pretty floral bonnet?

Xyl0c41n3 > If only EssExTee could be so grossly incandescent 11/26/2016 at 21:25

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You made a comment stereotyping a group of people and a model of car. That necessitated (yet another) comment about how stereotypes are bad. How many times is that point going to have to be made on Oppo before everyone finally learns “drive what makes you happy and don’t shit on other people for driving what makes them happy”?

For Sweden > Xyl0c41n3 11/26/2016 at 21:26

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Not much longer, when the Holden Ute ends production :(

If only EssExTee could be so grossly incandescent > fhrblig 11/26/2016 at 21:29

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It’s funny because I’m gay and I drive a BMW

yamahog > Mercedes Streeter 11/26/2016 at 21:29

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well shit, a straight girl called me ‘butch’ the other day and I drive a big red truck in the winter... might as well embrace that shit XD

yamahog > ranwhenparked 11/26/2016 at 21:30

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Well, we’ve got a kingdom too: https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Gay_and_Lesbian_Kingdom_of_the_Coral_Sea_Islands

fintail > If only EssExTee could be so grossly incandescent 11/26/2016 at 21:30

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Can confirm: I used to work with a gay guy who had a Miata and would have agreed.

His DD was an Allroad that strangely enough never once gave him a problem in the time I knew him.

Scary__goongala! > If only EssExTee could be so grossly incandescent 11/26/2016 at 21:30

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I don’t have the kind of fashion sense to be considered homosexual.

-NA driver

fhrblig > jkm7680 11/26/2016 at 21:33

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Up until a few years ago, Jettas were THE gay car. I’d say about 90% of them had rainbow stickers on them. Then it seemed like there was a sudden migration to the Acura TL. Now it seems more fragmented.

yamahog > If only EssExTee could be so grossly incandescent 11/26/2016 at 21:33

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are you coming out now??!! congrats!!

Life and Times of Magoo: The People's Champ > If only EssExTee could be so grossly incandescent 11/26/2016 at 21:33

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If only EssExTee could be so grossly incandescent > fintail 11/26/2016 at 21:35

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So, not opposaurus then?

jkm7680 > fhrblig 11/26/2016 at 21:35

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I don’t think I’ve ever seen a rainbow sticker on a Jetta. Subarus of all flavors? Yes.

If only EssExTee could be so grossly incandescent > yamahog 11/26/2016 at 21:36

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No, I’ve mentioned it on oppo before.

Xyl0c41n3 > jkm7680 11/26/2016 at 21:37

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The man who said that to me was under 40 — in other words, too young to have been around when commercials like that were on the air.

But the idea of marketing cars specifically to women as “women’s cars” isn’t an obsolete one. Jalopnik did a story a couple of years ago about a British(?) car made exclusively for women. It came with a lipstick holder.

The Honda Fit was advertised as the perfect car for women.

Acura has advertised its SUVs, with their voice-activated controls and in-steering-wheel controls as perfect for the flighty woman who has so much trouble multitasking that she accidentally conference calls her office and serenades them while she sings to a song she’s streaming from her phone into the SUV’s sound system.

Ford marketed the Fiesta as a “cool” car for cool millennial women who are always on the go.

They did a much better job with a Valentine’s Day ad they put out for the Mustang. It showed the car as a perfect one for women who drive aggressively by pranking three men who thought they were meeting a blind date. Instead, they were taken for a ride by their “date,” a female professional stunt driver, who took them through a closed course for some spins and handbrake turns. But not before the men asked her if she wanted them to drive her car instead, because it was a stick. Cuz you know, a woman who owns a car with a manual transmission doesn’t know how to drive stick cuz women don’t drive stick *eyeroll*

Xyl0c41n3 > TheHondaBro 11/26/2016 at 21:38

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You don’t drive a honda?! I feel so betrayed.

fintail > If only EssExTee could be so grossly incandescent 11/26/2016 at 21:40

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Not close. I think the car might have been a rebodied Corolla. He told me even his mechanic was astounded at how the car wasn’t troublesome. It still had wincing maintenance costs, but never broke.

TheHondaBro > yamahog 11/26/2016 at 21:41

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Only the prettiest.

jkm7680 > Xyl0c41n3 11/26/2016 at 21:42

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Wow, that’s actually a bit surprising. I’d get like a 70 year old guy saying that, wonder where he got that from.

But yeah, the whole idea of marketing particular cars to either males or females is a very dated marketing strategy.

That video is awesome, hah. Watched the entire thing before replying.

yamahog > If only EssExTee could be so grossly incandescent 11/26/2016 at 21:42

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I’d only ever seen you mention it in the context of feeling pressure to stay in the closet. Congrats anyway.

fhrblig > If only EssExTee could be so grossly incandescent 11/26/2016 at 21:44

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Then get out there, find a nice young man with a Miata and go have yourselves a track day!

TheTurbochargedSquirrel > Jake - Has Bad Luck So You Don't Have To 11/26/2016 at 21:45

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Did you not provide any haircuts?

Xyl0c41n3 > jkm7680 11/26/2016 at 21:48

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I love that video so much. Especially how much that one dude shits his pants. The one who asked her if she wasn’t sure she wanted HIM to drive HER car because it’s a manual.

jkm7680 > Xyl0c41n3 11/26/2016 at 21:50

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Yeah, haha. Itt was also awesome how nonchalantly she was throwing the car around and making small talk at the same time.

Dr. Zoidberg - RIP Oppo > Mercedes Streeter 11/26/2016 at 21:55

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Oh, behave!

Dr. Zoidberg - RIP Oppo > fintail 11/26/2016 at 21:56

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He must have been very gentle with it.

fhrblig > Life and Times of Magoo: The People's Champ 11/26/2016 at 21:57

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Hey, look! It’s a Jaguar E-type!

Eric @ opposite-lock.com > Mercedes Streeter 11/26/2016 at 22:17

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Subaru wagons are loved by lesbians, along with a lot of hatchbacks.

Wacko > Xyl0c41n3 11/26/2016 at 22:35

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The stereotype from the 80's and 90's is that v6 mustangs are for girls. V8 for the boys.

Wacko > XJDano 11/26/2016 at 22:38

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A gay person or a Miata?

fhrblig > Wacko 11/26/2016 at 22:42

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fhrblig > Scary__goongala! 11/26/2016 at 22:43

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Neither do I, and yet...

Wacko > fhrblig 11/26/2016 at 22:50

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Apparently some do..

Mercedes Streeter > yamahog 11/26/2016 at 23:13

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*hands you a spittoon*

Are we doing this right? lol

IanZ - limited-slip indifferential > fintail 11/26/2016 at 23:13

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It was his gay magic that held it together.

Tristan > Mercedes Streeter 11/26/2016 at 23:13

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I read several years ago that Subaru was the first (may still be the only?) car company to actively market their cars toward the LGBT community. I thought it was neat.

e36Jeff now drives a ZHP > jkm7680 11/26/2016 at 23:36

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I’ve heard of V6 mustangs being called secretary’s car and/or hairdresser’s car, but not the V8's.

Jack Does Cars > If only EssExTee could be so grossly incandescent 11/27/2016 at 00:41

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Me, A Gay, agrees with the logic. I’d buy one if I had, ya know, money. But I just bought a car so I’ll just stick with that for a while.

fintail > IanZ - limited-slip indifferential 11/27/2016 at 00:45

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That could be it.

His prior car was a Volvo XC70 that was nothing but trouble. Maybe there’s some kind of vibe.

Tapas > If only EssExTee could be so grossly incandescent 11/27/2016 at 07:31

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Might be a gay car, might not be a gay car - But I can’t say its a bad thing if it is a gay car.

Related funny observation I heard from a comedian, whose name I cant remember - but its true!

I think most straight men would agree, the one penis they have had experience with in their lives (their own) has been very positive. You like that penis very much, more than most things in fact.

Nauraushaun > If only EssExTee could be so grossly incandescent 11/29/2016 at 04:46

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People only say this stuff when they don’t know anything about cars. The sort of people that equate them with any number of FWD hairdresser cars. The MX-5/Miata is a RWD sports car, it’s made for driving.

CaptDale - is secretly British > If only EssExTee could be so grossly incandescent 11/29/2016 at 11:18

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But....but, I drive a GTO and am too tall for a Miata. Does my little red Sprite count as a gay-mobile?

CaptDale - is secretly British > Mercedes Streeter 11/29/2016 at 11:20

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Well the Miata is the “gay mans car” and the Forester is the “gay woman’s car” at least in most stereotypes I’ve heard.

CaptDale - is secretly British > TheTurbochargedSquirrel 11/29/2016 at 11:20

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I think you have to have your Miata rights taken away if you don’t give at least 1 hair cut a month.

CaptDale - is secretly British > fhrblig 11/29/2016 at 11:21

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Hey now, I mean come on, the E-Type isn’t that bad.

CaptDale - is secretly British > vondon302 11/29/2016 at 11:22

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^This!

fhrblig > CaptDale - is secretly British 11/29/2016 at 13:34

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Then why do I want to get my hands on one so bad?

CaptDale - is secretly British > fhrblig 11/29/2016 at 13:40

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Both hands? That’s impressive.... HA

But seriously, I want an XKE so badly too, as you may have seen.... I am just saying they really aren’t a, “Hey bro, my penis bro, its HUGE bro.” type of car.

fhrblig > CaptDale - is secretly British 11/29/2016 at 23:32

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No, I’m more referring to the phallic-ness of its shape. That’s a LOOOOOONG hood there.

CaptDale - is secretly British > fhrblig 11/30/2016 at 10:52

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I know.... I guess I wouldn’t be opposed. Just never liked that comparison for some reason.